i wake with a start and realize that my 2025 essence has not yet been captured.
i had just spent 90 minutes writing a corporate performance review (and many more minutes thinking about the unpleasant task of writing a corporate performance review), yet I couldn't be bothered to sit down and memorialize my current quarter-life crisis to my future mid-life self in crisis. For shame!
granted, this is a lot more fun than enumerating deliverables and professional development goals. if only my manager (she is very nice) can award me stock options based on this stream of consciousness ramble. perhaps in post-late-stage capitalism, we can return to rewarding best effort and goodwill.
books read: The Sympathizer, Fingersmith, Kitchen Confidential, How to Talk About Books You Haven’t Read, This is Your Brain on Music, Among the Thugs, All Systems Red, The Three Body Problem (all 3 original books, but not the fourth author-endorsed fan fiction), In Cold Blood, The Woman Who Smashed Code, Dune, The Priory of the Orange Tree, Witchcraft for Wayward Girls, Fairy Tale (Stephen King), and a bunch of YA/Romance/Fantasy.
i was unfortunately a little silly and injured my left (glute? hamstring? adductor?), thus falling off my training plan 6 weeks before the SF marathon. Still, I'm happy to be somewhat recovered enough to hobble for 26.2 miles next week, which seems an apt analog for life in general -develop a coping mechanism, make a plan, have the plan dissolve, and somehow manage (fingers crossed). Nonetheless, I am in good spirits, feeling healthy, and excited for a trip to Banff in the coming weeks with friends.
things to WRITE about but haven't gotten around to because of other mind-numbing activities:
- taiwan 2023 (combine with final thoughts on relationships, closure, reincarnation of friendship)
- grudges 2024 (connect to work nemeses, being disliked as a people pleaser, the commencement of childhood friendships, engagements/housewarmings)
- japan 2023 (talk about film snobbery)
- new zealand 2024 (talk about ambition and alpaca farms and comparison)
- biking (in general, bike to work day, mountain, road, track, century, triathlon board experience)
- 2023 + 2024 library wrapped
- stick shift (resurgence of pick-me, but also not wanting to relive high school a la track racing)
- the graveyard of projects (creative and academic pursuits)