It has been an interesting end to my sophomore year of college. Most of the people I know have been safe and healthy, so that is all I can really ask for. I'll write the rest of this blog post under the guise of normalcy.
~~~ Ahem :^) ~~~
Despite the slightly terrifying situation of being two years away from the "real world" (whatever that may be), I have to say that each semester of college progressively gets better. We moved into our own apartment, cooked our meals, lugged our groceries from Trader Joe's up a breath-taking hill, wandered around Berkeley too late into the night, and fought off a few ant infestations.
Looking back, I'm proud that I dove into new opportunities each semester, even if I felt severely underprepared and underqualified. I've taken leadership positions in clubs, did a summer of research, quit some other clubs, became a TA, and even exercised regularly (heh). Somehow my grades have improved, I'm less afraid of math, and I like studying even when the material at first glance looks like a foreign language. I also somehow navigated my first recruiting season, in which my friend (I owe her a lot) taught me how to do technical interviews, and I attempted to read Cracking the Coding Interview. Our team even tied for second place in our DSP class's contest :))) Since my internship is now remote, the first few days have just been submitting paperwork and attending virtual orientation, so I decided to catch up on the blog.
After rereading the first few paragraphs of my writing, it seems like fear is an underlying theme. I'm not sure when fear became such a prominent emotion in my thought processes, but rationalizing about it some more has led me to think that this emotion is more like a caution sign telling me to take each step with care, rather than a road block. Undoubtedly, fear exists on a sliding scale, and there are scarier things in this world than a college student failing. But I really really don't want this emotion to limit the things I try in life, even though I still feel hesitant to vocalize a dream for fear of not achieving it.
On that fun note, here are some summer goals for myself (aside from the usual laundry list of exercising, cooking, and good social/mental health):
- make a lofi song
- play piano
- study some robotics
Hopefully I can replenish my lack of creativity and culture by engaging in the arts before my mind dries out as an engineer. (jk engineering is creative too but I'm not on that level yet)
Though I'm pretty sure no one reads these blogs, here are my links :D
Donate: https://www.shfb.org/
Listen: Kenshi Yonezu + Aimer I will see them over BTS if either one ever comes to America.
Watch: Hospital Playlist Now I want to be a doctor with a merry band (aha) of friends, but honestly who wouldn't. Please note my career aspirations vary wildly with the currently airing Kdrama.
Read: The Stranger [Albert Camus]. Why think my own existential thoughts when I can hear them from Meursault?
Taste: Milk Bread (My roommate made this and it looked yummy so now I shall try too)
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| happy holidays lol |
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